Reviews

The Da Vinci Code

I expected that perhaps some of the critics in Cannes might have gone overboard. You know, passing on their love for the American "novelist" who allegedly plagiarized Michael Baigent and Richard Leigh's Holy Blood Holy Grail. Well, I've discovered with my own eyes that the critics were right on target. Here's how I knew: I slept through about 40% of the film. The worst part of the film: Every scene involving Tom Hanks. The best part of the film: Some of the camera work in a few scenes. I can sum it up in two words: major snoozefest. I'd rather endure a three hour animated film or back to back episodes of Dr. Phil. Seriously.

X-Men The Last Stand (spoilers...)

Apparently Halle Berry demanded a bigger and tougher role since Catwoman completely flopped. OK, but did they have to kill Xavier to make that happen? (Do i really care--am not much of an X-Men fan really...) Anyway, lately it seems that the recent trendy equation for film/TV is this: Kill for Credibility! I guess Brett Ratner took that equation one, no, two steps higher. I wish there could be a Hogwartian film just about life at the mutant school. Or a serious mockumentary about mutant life and the various powers they possess. Like, how would one be able to mentally transcribe? Would that be because that mutant had a lot of teachers in the family? As I said, I'm not big X-Men fan, but for the two hours or so that I spent in the theater, I forgot about cube farms, office politics, and the fact that time was carrying me through Memorial weekend at breakneck speed.

Here are a few tidbits from recent Netflix brain candy rentals. Great films for when I don't want to think, which is generally after 6 p.m. these days... If I'm still watching beyond the first ten minutes, it's generally a good sign.

Last Holiday

Queen Latifah needs to come out already! It's getting pretty painful watching her pretend to be smitten with rapper-actors. That said, it was a fun film except for the very unnecessary subplot involving Timothy Hutton's character. Queen Latifah and Gerard Depardieu worked like walnuts and brie--great pairing and therefore the most sincere relationship of the whole film. I've always liked Queen Latifah--she has a whole lot of that Piscean charisma. That said, can someone tell her agent to stop getting her Wal-Mart commercials?

The Family Stone

Hated this film in the first 10 minutes. Why is it that in a Blockbuster film the gay people, people of color, and people with disabilities are all embodied in one or two characters? One gay man is short, white, and deaf. His partner is black and was permanently fixated in the kitchen. Everyone else is "pretty" and "normal." So annoying. Another distracting point--I love Sex in the City, when I saw Sarah JP playing an uptight character, all I saw was "Carrie" having a bad day because of too small Manolo Blanicks. I applaud anyone who actually made it through this film.

Rumor Has It

I expected to actually detest this film as well, but it was surprisingly enjoyable. Don't ask why because it seemed to have everything going against it, namely: Jennifer Aniston and Kevin Costner. Shirley MacLaine's was doing her "I'll put on a pot of bourbon," thing and killed (i mean this in a good way) her lines with her rough and tumble grace. Kevin Costner wasn't as insufferable as I thought he'd be--his character was, so that was enough. Mark Ruffalo's character was appropriate, sincere, and realistic. Generally, the story was interesting for a cheesy premise...it was OK for me. Read: it kept me awake for the whole film.